Change in weight (11/03/20 – 11/09/20): +2.0 LBS
Folks, this week was a rollercoaster. I had all the feelings and all the emotions. Guess what? I ate through them all. There is no question as to why I gained back weight. There is no doubt what I need to do to counteract it. As I write this, I am 50% upset with the weight setback, but 50% happy with other things from the past week. Let’s dig into it.
First let’s discuss the eating.
I have not overcome my desire to eat when I am stressed, anxious, happy, or most any emotion. I feel that this may be something that never ‘cures’, just something I learn to adjust and control. Much of my success over the past 11 months has been controlling these urges and keeping them to a minimum. But last week, with the election, with being overworked, and with a toddler who chose not to sleep 4 nights, I succumbed and definitely let it go.
I remember one day this week where I ended up order takeout dumplings because I was so over it. I ate them all, on top of my meals, and felt so sick. After that I was filled with self-loathing and anger. This was just a super unfortunate day. I need to constantly remind myself that I am stronger and it is okay to have bad days. The self-loathing, I would argue, is worse than the mistakes themselves. This is because I still deserve to be proud of myself. I do not have to be proud of poor choices, but that should not translate to differing feelings of my personal value.
The positives:
I live near Blue Hills in Mass. I like to hike up to the observatory to clear my head and give me a quick workout. I have been timing these hikes lately to see how much stronger and faster I am getting. The first time I did this hike with my wife, 5ish years ago, it took me 23 minutes. I probably could have done it faster, but I just remember that time. A few weeks back I did it in just under 14 minutes. Saturday morning, I did it in under 12. I also hiked half way back down and then interval jogged up the service road. Again, this is no big hill, but the incremental progress is hard to ignore. That is strength and that is progress. I felt awesome about it and am still super pleased.
In addition to this I had a PR on a 45 minute ride and am again trying to get back in the flow with some strength. I did a good few sets last night of squats, pushups, planks, bridges, and some stretching.
Conclusions:
I will bounce back because I have proven to myself that I can. I have multiple times over the past 11 months. I am worth every effort I put into myself and I will continue to invest in myself knowing that. If you didn’t see last week’s post, I will leave 3 three important points that I mentioned below. They are always important and help me.
- My weight on the scale does not represent anything other than a snapshot of a moment in time.
This number doesn’t show my weight as much as it shows a commitment. It doesn’t show anything about my value, but the effort it took the get here says everything about my value. This is a flag or a billboard for myself and others to see that this guy is doing what this guy wants and what this guy feels he deserves. I deserve to attain my goals, reach for success, and further along my life in the way I see fit. I am attaining that every day. - I can do what I previously thought was beyond reach
I spent years saying “I guess this is how it is.” I was wrong. I needed to prove to myself first, that I could. Now far less seems beyond reach. - This commitment, dedication, and pride spreads to all aspects of my life.
This confidence that comes from taking ownership of my life, my body, and my feelings has helped me recognize that in other areas, I deserve what I am worth. This has allowed me to work harder, demand more, and not settle when I know something is not worth my time.
I have truly discovered a new way of recognizing my value and this self awareness is priceless.
Leave a like or a comment. Do you eat your feelings? We should be friends.
How did I do on last weeks action plan?:
- 5 Cardio workouts. 1 45 min ride, 1 HIIT Ride, 1 Low Impact ride, 1 run. Attained
- 2 Strength Sessions (Tues/Sat) Not attained
- Plan out my meals, stick to them, and portion snacks. Not Attained.
- 2 additional outdoor activities. This can include walks with my daughter, disc golfing, skiing, etc. Attained
- 3 dedicated stretch sessions. 2 10-min lower body and 1 10 min full body (Mon/Wed/Fri). Not Attained
- 20-30 minute midday walk on work days. Attained
- Track every bite. Not Attained
- Drink 10 glasses of water per day. Attained
- Find some quiet time to calm my thoughts and mind. 2 5-10 minute sessions. Not Attained
Action Plan
- 5 Cardio workouts. 1 45 min ride, 1 HIIT Ride, 1 Low Impact ride, 1 misc ride, 1 run.
- 2 Strength Sessions (Tues/Sat)
- Plan out my meals, stick to them, and portion snacks
- 2 additional outdoor activities. This can include walks with my daughter, disc golfing, skiing, etc
- 3 dedicated stretch sessions. 2 10-min lower body and 1 10 min full body (Mon/Wed/Fri)
- 20-30 minute midday walk on work days
- Track every bite
- Drink 10 glasses of water per day
- Find some quiet time to calm my thoughts and mind. 2 5-10 minute sessions
Please stay tuned for more updates. If you have been enjoying this, please become an email follower or a wordpress follower. Having this public audience has been a positive motivation for me to continue working towards my goals and so I really am thankful for all of you!
| Date | Change in Weight |
| 12/1* | – |
| 12/2* | -5.4 lbs |
| 12/9 | -5.4 lbs |
| 12/16 | -3.4 lbs |
| 12/23 | +2.8 lbs |
| 12/29 | -1.2 lbs |
| 1/6 | -1.4 lbs |
| 1/13 | -1.6 lbs |
| 1/20 | -1.4 lbs |
| 1/27 | +0.4 lbs |
| 2/3 | -1.2 lbs |
| 2/10 | -4.6 lbs |
| 2/17 | +0.4 lbs |
| 2/24 | -1.6 lbs |
| 3/2 | -3.2 lbs |
| 3/9 | +1.8 lbs |
| 3/16 | -3.2 lbs |
| 3/23 | -0.6 lbs |
| 3/30 | +0.4 lbs |
| 4/6 | -1.6 lbs |
| 4/13 | +0.8 lbs |
| 4/20 | -1.8 lbs |
| 4/27 | 0 lbs |
| 5/4 | +2.4 lbs |
| 5/11 | -5.2 lbs |
| 5/18 | 0 lbs |
| 5/25 | -1.0 lbs |
| 6/1 | -1.2 lbs |
| 6/8 | -0.4 lbs |
| 6/15 | -0.8 lbs |
| 6/22 | +0.8 lbs |
| 6/29 | -1.4 lbs |
| 7/6 | -2.4 lbs |
| 7/13 | +2.4 lbs |
| 7/20 | -1.6 lbs |
| 7/27 | -0.4 lbs |
| 8/3 | -1.2 lbs |
| 8/10 | +0.4 lbs |
| 8/17 | -1.4 lbs |
| 8/24 | -1.4 lbs |
| 8/31 | -0.2 lbs |
| 9/7 | -0.6 lbs |
| 9/14 | -1.4 lbs |
| 9/21 | +0.2 lbs |
| 9/28 | -1.8 lbs |
| 10/5 | -0.2 lbs |
| 10/12 | -1.0 lbs |
| 10/19 | -1.0 lbs |
| 10/26 | +0.8 lbs |
| 11/2 | -1.4 lbs |
| 11/9 | +2.0 lbs |
* I first weighed myself on a Sunday night and began the regular weigh-ins the following morning
-Ben
a better ben 